Thoughts about Writing · 8 August 2020
I am thinking out loud here as I have some thoughts about writing. (I wonder if they are at all coherent.)
I have been so focused on other projects lately that I nearly forgot my blog post for the week. Not really. I think about it quite a bit.
“I will get to it tomorrow.”
“I think I already have a post ready.”
“I wonder if anybody would really care if I missed a week.”
“I suppose I should get something written.”
“I wonder if anybody actually read it.”
Oh I have other thoughts too.
I sometimes wonder who I think I am that I would blog each week thinking people might really read what I have written. I wonder whether I really am an honest to goodness writer. I wonder if there is something that might be a better use of my time. And then I realize the truth of the saying. Once you make the decision, the decision makes you.
I made the decision to be a writer a long time ago. Then, it took a long time of writing just when I felt like it to realize that being a writer was much more than writing when you felt inspired. So I felt like I had made it when I started writing every day. “Woo hoo! I am a real writer. I write every day.”
Now, I know the truth of the matter. “Big whoop. You write every day. It only matters to you.”
But try as I might, I cannot stop writing. Much to the chagrin of the internet poop monitors. (If such people exist.)
I cannot stop writing because, like I already said, once you make the decision, the decision makes you. And I made the decision to write every day a long time ago. Which has produced some interesting results. I have lots of words on the internet. I have some books on Amazon. I have more books in the queue waiting for final edits, covers, formatting, or whatever else they need to get out there. I also have some flotsam and jetsam that will never see the light of day. So whether I want to continue to write every day, I do not have much choice anymore. I made the choice long ago and I am seeing it through to its logical conclusion.
I actually wonder what the logical conclusion of writing everyday is. I am hoping that it means people read my stuff. My blog or my books.
I used to think that the logical conclusion of writing was that I would be a commercial success in the writing business. That I would actually make money. But when I think about it, that does not matter much to me anymore. Sure, I would like to make money at my writing, but that is not what matters. What matters is that I am doing what I am supposed to be doing. What I believe God wants me to do. Even if that means that hundreds of thousands of my words sit idly on the internet gathering digital cobwebs in a musty website.
Well, I am not sure if I wrote anything today. I did give myself a little pep talk though. And I also have at least two topics for the future. I guess it is okay to just think out loud about writing.
© 2020 Michael T. Miyoshi
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